i am gayI am gay…three short words that many parents dread to hear, three short words that can rip a lot of relationships apart, from family to friends, in just a second. But need it be like this?

There is a huge misconception about gay people that says sexuality is a choice…it isn’t. Heterosexuals (those sexually oriented towards the opposite sex) assume that relationships are such by default, when in fact this depends on every person’s own feelings. Can you make a heterosexual person feel sexually interested into a person of the same sex? Of course not! Same with homosexual people…it is not a choice they make, but it is themselves coming clean about who they truly are and what they truly feel.

Homosexual people don’t just come out as gay just for fun, which leads us to honesty and trust. If someone comes to you and tells you, “I am gay“, it is because they trust you fully and that they don’t want to hide their true selves with you. Okay an initial shocking reaction may be reasonable, however, do appreciate the fact that your child/friend/relative has come to you and trusted you with something as personal as this.

Another factor that plays a role in how many of us still see homosexuals is without a doubt, religion. Certain religions (including the Christian Catholic one) see gay people as a threat to society and consider them as “sins” or “sinful people”. Some even go to extremes, saying they would rather get rid of their gay sons and lesbian daughters rather than being there for them, because they don’t want other kids to be influenced by these “sinful” people.

i am gayFor starters, all of us here on earth, we are all equal, all identical, all connected. There shouldn’t be such thing as considering any of our brothers or sisters as “sins” just because their sexual orientation is different from ours.

In addition to this, whether a man loves a man, a woman loves a woman, or a man loves a woman, it doesn’t make any difference as long as there is true love and respect. One shouldn’t be embarassed seeing gay couples in public being loving and caring to each other…what one should be embarassed with should be couples that stay together without any hint of love whatsoever. Kids wouldn’t be scandalised by seeing gay couples, they would however take a wrong impression of love if they see couples who are supposedly in love yet they fight in public and shout at each other just to prove their point, showing no respect to each other at all. It is not the sexual orientation that counts, it is true and genuine feelings.

On a personal note, considering the title of this post being “I am gay”, I am not gay, nor is anyone in my family so far. But I do educate my kids into looking for true unconditional love rather than looking for any particular sexually oriented person. That should be our primary focus for all of us parents…to teach love and encourage them to love themselves, accept themselves as they are and seek someone who can love them in the same manner in return, with respect.

I have been blessed with having quite a good amount of gay and lesbian friends, and I have absolutely nothing against them at all. They are very friendly caring respectful people that are truthful and friendly, and who don’t hide their true selves in front of others.

Ironically, my first boyfriend turned out to be gay. I didn’t know at the time and I feel he didn’t know either. Looking back I loved him with all my heart, yet I felt that though he loved me, I wasn’t all he needed…that was when I broke up with him. That moment was probably the first time I felt I had to trust my intuition and let him go even though he was everything I had ever wished for, and I was heartbroken as much as he was, because our relationship was based on innocent genuine love and respect. He probably won’t even see this article, but I genuinely wish him and his partner a lot of love and happiness.

Based on my own experience I feel 100% sure that gay people do not just wake up and decide they want to be gay…they just wake up and realise that they are.

i am gayAs I am writing this blogpost I am hoping that anyone who has just heard “I am gay” from someone they didn’t quite expect, ends up reading this. If you are one of these people, know that it is understandable that you feel torn, worried and emotional about this, but think about it. Did you love this person before he/she opened up with you? Did you respect this person and seeked his/her opinions? Did he/she matter to you? Being labelled gay shouldn’t change those same feelings that you had before for him/her. Appreciate that he/she trusted you enough to come clean about something this personal. Appreciate the truthfulness of this person.

And if this person is your own child, accept him/her as he/she is. Be there no matter what. Seek their happiness and yours. Do not stand in their way of being their true selves with you. Focus on their virtues, their loyalty, their trust…

Love unconditionally and always remember, from the sky below, we are all connected, we are all one, no matter what.

Love & Light to all xxx

 

P.S. Please feel free to discuss by leaving your comments below. Kindly be respectful. Disrespectful comments will be promptly deleted. Thanks.

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